What is the practice of non-attachment?
— and can it be used to enhance our mental health?
When you hear the term non-attachment, what comes to mind for you?
This wording can bring up thoughts of detachment and we might even begin to question, “How does disconnecting or paying less attention to my life benefit me or my overall mental health?”
To dig deeper into the understanding of this topic, some misconceptions can be cleared. Non-attachment does not imply a lack of care, intentionality, or thoughtfulness within life. Rather, this perspective can increase objectivity as we observe our lives and can assist us with the emotional challenges that we experience. Non-attachment emphasizes the impermanence of the human experience and allows us to reflect upon the pain that we can experience as we navigate between craving (chasing the things we find pleasurable) and aversion (creating blocks to the things we do not find pleasurable) within our daily lives.
Non attachment does not imply a lack of care, intentionality, or thoughtfulness within life
Non-Attachment as a concept is derived from Buddhist philosophy, in which individuals strive for renunciation (NEKKHAMMA) – a freedom from suffering (DUHKHA) that can stem from personal attachments within our lifetime. The root of this notion is the assertion that fixation and attachment is the core element of suffering, and the aim is to transcend personal suffering through a transcendence of the self.
Whilst the concept of non-attachment is taken from Buddhist ideology, Western research reveals the benefit of this practice through the lens of modern psychology. You might even recognize the names of some individuals who have been noted with bridging the gap between Western and Eastern Philosophy’s like: Jon Kabat-Zinn, Tara Brach, Richard Schwartz, and Marsha Linehan – to only name a few.
Research, specifically on the concept of non-attachment to the self, has yielded great insights on how aligning our lives with the notion of non-attachment can reveal new perspective, insight, and clarity within our lived experiences.
Researched insights to consider:
01. Non Attachment Limits incongruence between experience and the self concept
This allows an individual to move through their life with greater flexibility and understanding of the ever changing nature of the self and a view of life that is free from expectation and fixation
02. Non Attachment can reduce our emotional reactivity to triggering stimuli
Stimuli like negative self evaluations and criticism from others
03. An attached sense of self can create negative emotions
Fixations on self focused thoughts and feelings are associated with a range of negative psychological symptoms when the sense of self is used to filter and weigh external stimuli. When perceptions of the self are fixed and negative we can experience common symptoms like anxiety and depression
At this point you may be questioning, “How do I recognize where I might be attached?” Here are some key signs to look out for in self reflection:
You often wish for things in your life to remain the same
You expereince ruminating thoughts about the future
You are challenged with perspective taking beyond your own beliefs
You recognize defence mechanisms that work to protect the current view of the self
Example: You receive criticism that is a threat to your self esteem and you engage in defenses such as immediately dismissing the criticism to protect your own fixed view of yourself
You have an idea of yourself that is not susceptible to change
Example: Clinging to positive notions of the self (i.e. being a good student) to the degree that any conflicting information will create dissonance and challenge (i.e. receiving a bad grade)
These things are normal and expected as we navigate our lives as we attempt to continually make sense of ourselves in relation to our environments (see my blog entry on mindfulness that references parts of the brain that assist us with this process). This list above is nothing more than an affirmation of your own humanity – we all share these from time to time and we might have similar experiences of pain from them.
We share common humanity in our challenges and we can also create unity in our shared solutions to these challenges. If you are looking to begin a practice of non-attachment in your daily life, here are some key elements to consider, though not an exhaustive list:
Affirm that failure is a realistic possibility and can serve as a learning opportunity
Challenge your expectations and fixed beliefs
Practice non-judgmental, mindful awareness and acceptance of occurrences in life
NOTE - we can accept the things that we do not like and this frees up our emotional energy to create change where needed and necessary
My intention for you is that as you have read this article you have found an element that resonates and maybe even have further questions about. I encourage you to navigate the links below to learn more from those who have inspired the work that I do as a licensed therapist who aims to create transformation for clients – collaboratively walking beside them as they cultivate powerful change and growth within their lives.
Curious about how therapy can be beneficial to you at this time? Want to know how this element of non-attachment can be integrated into your life? If so feel free to contact me to begin your individualized healing journey with a free 15 minute consultation!
Helpful Links:
See the links below to resources that can assist you in learning more about the practice of non-attachment.
Letting Go of Self: The Creation of the Non-Attachment to Self Scale
